Nigerian Jokes

Never argue with a woman , just use your brains like this Waffi guy. A man went on a night out with his friends the wife is furious and tells the kids that when he comes back they must not open the door for him. At about 12 midnight the man comes back and knocks...the Wife tells him "Go sleep where you dey come from o!!" Judging by her tone of voice that her fury is about to overflow,the man answered "Relax I no com sleep, nah the condoms wey dey on top table for my room I come collect. In fact give them to me. Plenty women dey for the party!" The wife opened the door and said,"Where you dey go? Oya Enter o! Come inside the house before I change my mind!"

There was this day that entered a bus going from Ketu to Ojuelegba in Lagos, and a guy entered after me. He was well-dressed and looked slick, what we call ' a botta boy'. When it was time to pay,the following conversation ensued: "How much is the t-fare?", he asked the conductor in a British accent. "Wetin you talk?", the conductor asked back, with raised eyebrows. I didn't blame the boy, as the guy was almost inaudible. The cream young man repeated himself twice before someone came to his rescue and "interpreted" for him. He gave the conductor five hundred naira, and was expecting change but the conductor simply ignored his outstreched hand and faced the other passengers. The young man waited patiently until the conductor was through with the others, before demanding (again in that British accent) for his change but the conductor continued ignoring him. When the bus was descending the bridge and approaching the final bus stop, the young ma...