Nigerian Jokes

God created the donkey and said to him, "You will be a donkey. You will work untiringly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years." The donkey answered, "I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is much. Give me only 20." God granted his wish. God created the dog and said to him, "You will guard the house of Man. You will be his best friend. You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30 years. You will be a dog." The dog answered, "Sir, to live 30 years is too much. Give me only 15." God granted his wish. God created the monkey and said to him, "You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks. You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. You will be a monkey." The monkey answered, "To live 20 years is too much. Give me only 10." God granted his wish. Finally god created man, and said to him, "You will be man, the...

A Lawyer and a Jamaican... A lawyer and a Jamaican are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that Jamaicans are so dumb that he can fool them easy... So the lawyer asks if the Jamaican would like to play a fun game. The Jamaican is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and says that the game is a lot of fun. 'I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500..' This catches the Jamaican's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's the distance from The Earth to the moon?' The Jamaican doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer. Now, it's the Jamaican's turn. He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with three legs, and co...